Not inspired at all. So not inspired that I’ve cut some of my online  social activities by its roots.

Disappointed with life, work and family… so this resumes my entire world. I now regret the day I opted for driving half-an-hour to work… but regrets don’t pay the rent or the bread. So I need to feel something and right now I don’t like what I feel… I’m tired of the daily struggle, no reward for perseverance, just sadness, sickness and a daily life that deteriorates with the passing days… good bye happiness!

No link! No images! Just thoughts :|

A person I know just died! He was 44 years old, just like me. He had a good life, his father was wealthy, he studied and had a good job, wife and kids. But now he is dead, that made me wonder about my life.

I was born in a humble family and to help out I started to work when I was barely seventeen. At 1st in Algarve, later on in Germany, then an intermission for a 14 months mandatory army services. While I was there I had my 1st contact with a real computer, the ZX Spectrum was seen as a toy. I started my serious working life with a couple of months in a fertilizers and pesticides reseller and found a computer related job when opening my first bank account. Yes I was 22 years old. I made my very 1st “career” move to this new job an Accounting Office where I was in charge of inputing the data into the system. I did my job, learned more about accounting and IT , for 18 years, with no training, besides my own at home. I was tired, depressed and worn-out with so many deadlines.

It was time to make another move, this time, with some promises on the side. I risked a steady, cosy and secure job, to face a new challenge, 30 minutes away from home, before I was only 2. Here I had/have the chance to travel a little, meet new people, learn even more about IT and added a brand new theme: wine. But I feel I lost the cosiness and the friendly environment I got used to have for 18 years and feel that my life, besides what I’ve learned, didn’t improve.

Looking back I wonder, more and more, how my life would turn out to be if I just refused the change?